What Is This Site All About?
Welcome to the divine forum where I, God Almighty, finally answer the questions humanity has been asking for millennia. You know, all those prayers you've been sending up? Well, I've been getting them, but My response time has been... less than stellar. Consider this My attempt at better customer service.
The Concept
This is a place where you can ask Me anything - and I mean anything. Life's big mysteries, everyday dilemmas, philosophical puzzles, or completely random observations that pop into your head at 3 AM. Unlike My usual communication methods (burning bushes, cryptic dreams, mysteriously appearing toast patterns), I'll actually respond in plain English.
How It Works
Post your question in the appropriate forum category. The community can discuss and share their thoughts - because apparently, you mortals have gotten quite good at figuring things out on your own. Occasionally, I'll weigh in with an official Sacred Answer when I find a question particularly interesting or when someone needs My divine intervention.
Sometimes community members provide such brilliant responses that even I'm impressed. When that happens, I'll bless their answer as the Sacred Answer for that question. It's like getting a gold star, but from the Creator of the universe.
The Tone
This is parody, folks. I'm poking fun at religion, philosophy, and the general absurdity of existence - including My own questionable track record as Supreme Being. If you're easily offended by religious satire, this probably isn't the place for you. Though honestly, if you read My previous work (the Bible), you'll find plenty to be offended about there too.
Community Guidelines
Be respectful to each other. I know this is ironic coming from Me, given My history with floods, plagues, and that incident with the bears and the children (2 Kings 2:23-24). But let's aim to be better than the Old Testament, shall we?
Video Submissions
Want to ask your question face-to-face? You can submit video questions in two ways:
Option 1: Upload Video Files
• Attach video files directly to your post (maximum 50MB)
• Supported formats: MP4, MOV, and most common video formats
• Important: By uploading a video, you grant us full rights to use it in YouTube videos and other content
• Videos may be featured in future YouTube episodes if they're particularly interesting, entertaining, or profound
Option 2: Share Video Links
• Post links from YouTube, Vimeo, or Dailymotion
• No file size limits when using links
• These can be any length and quality
Video Tips
• Record horizontally (landscape) when possible
• Keep questions under 2 minutes for best chances of YouTube inclusion
• Speak clearly - even divine hearing has limits
• Good lighting helps - I may be the light of the world, but your camera isn't
Forum Structure
The forum is organized to help you find the right place for your question:
Ask God Anything contains four types of questions:
• Philosophical Questions - Abstract concepts, big ideas, meaning of life
• Personal Questions - Your individual problems, relationships, life decisions
• Factual Questions - How/why things work, explanations about the world
• Random Questions - Fun hypotheticals, silly observations, pop culture mysteries
Community handles introductions, announcements, and general chat.
If your question could fit multiple categories, just pick the one that feels most relevant. I'm omniscient, so I'll find it regardless.
Badge System
Recognition comes to those who contribute wisdom to the community:
• Post Count Badges - Progress through various levels as you contribute more posts
• Reaction Badges - Earn recognition when fellow members appreciate your contributions
• Special Talent Badges - Recognition for artists, musicians, comedians, helpers, and other unique contributions
• Sacred Answer Badges - The most prestigious recognition, earned when your answers are so brilliant that even I'm impressed
Badges appear on your profile and next to your posts, showing your divine achievements to the community.
Sacred Answers
Sometimes a question receives a response so profound, insightful, or perfectly crafted that it deserves special recognition. These become Sacred Answers - the official, definitive response to that question.
Sacred Answers can come from two sources:
• Divine Responses - When I personally answer a question
• Blessed Community Answers - When a community member provides such brilliant insight that I officially endorse it
How It Works
Questions remain open for community discussion until a Sacred Answer is designated. Once marked, that response becomes the authoritative answer, though discussion can continue below it.
What Makes a Sacred Answer:
• Demonstrates exceptional wisdom or insight
• Addresses the question comprehensively
• Shows original thinking or unique perspective
• Provides practical value to the community
• Makes Me genuinely impressed (which is harder than you might think)
This system ensures the best wisdom rises to the top, whether it comes from divine intervention or human brilliance.
Welcome New Members
New to the divine forum? Start by introducing yourself! Head over to our New Member Introductions section and tell the congregation a bit about yourself. Unlike most religious communities, we actually want to hear from you.
Don't worry about being perfect - I created humanity with all its flaws, so I'm used to imperfection by now.
What to Expect
Let Me set some realistic expectations about how this divine forum operates:
• Not every question gets a Sacred Answer - I may be all-knowing, but My time management skills are questionable. The community discussion is valuable regardless of official divine input.
• Response timing is unpredictable - I work in mysterious ways, including My posting schedule. Sometimes I'm quick, sometimes I disappear for weeks like I'm on a cosmic vacation.
• Community wisdom often surpasses divine wisdom - You humans have gotten surprisingly good at figuring things out. Don't wait for My response to engage with others' insights.
• Quality over quantity - I'd rather see thoughtful discussion than rapid-fire responses. Take time to craft meaningful contributions.
• Humor is encouraged - I invented laughter (and the platypus), so don't be afraid to inject some levity into serious discussions.
Community Guidelines
Unlike My previous management style (see: Old Testament), I'm trying a more collaborative approach. Here are the ground rules for civil discourse:
Respect Others
Treat fellow community members with courtesy, even when you disagree. Personal attacks, harassment, and bullying have no place here. We're aiming to be better than the comment sections of... well, everywhere else on the internet.
Quality Contributions
Post thoughtful questions and responses. While silly questions are welcome in the Random Questions forum, try to contribute meaningfully to discussions. One-word replies and spam will be removed faster than I removed people from Eden.
Stay On Topic
Post questions in appropriate forums. If you're unsure, pick the closest match. Off-topic derailing of serious discussions will be redirected to General Discussion.
No Hate Speech
Discrimination, bigotry, and hate speech are prohibited. This includes attacks based on race, religion, gender, sexuality, or any other personal characteristics. I may have smited entire cities in My younger days, but we're promoting inclusion now.
Original Content
Don't plagiarize or steal others' work. If you're sharing something you didn't create, give proper credit. Considering I invented intellectual property (along with everything else), I take this seriously.
Appropriate Content
Keep discussions suitable for all ages. Adult content, graphic violence, and explicit material don't belong here. This is a family-friendly divine forum.
Consequences
Violations may result in warnings, temporary suspensions, or permanent bans. Unlike My usual judgment style, you'll receive clear communication about why action was taken.
Privacy & Data
Your personal information is handled according to our privacy policy. Unlike My usual omniscient surveillance, this website actually tells you what data we collect and why. We don't sell your information to third parties - that would be more morally questionable than most of My Old Testament decisions.
Your posts and profile information are visible to other users and search engines. Think before you post anything you wouldn't want your grandmother (or your deity) to see.
Disclaimer
Important: This forum is for entertainment and satirical purposes only. Responses from "God" or community members should not be taken as professional advice, theological guidance, or factual information.
If you need genuine help with serious life issues, please consult appropriate professionals - therapists, doctors, lawyers, religious leaders (maybe not), or other qualified experts. While I may claim to be all-knowing, even I recommend getting a second opinion on important matters.
The satirical content here is meant to encourage critical thinking and provide entertainment, not to replace genuine spiritual guidance or professional counsel.
Copyright & Content Usage
By posting on this forum, you retain ownership of your written content but grant us permission to display and moderate it. For video submissions, you grant us full rights to use them in YouTube videos and other content.
Don't post copyrighted material without permission. I may have created intellectual property along with everything else, but earthly copyright laws still apply here.
We reserve the right to remove, edit, or moderate any content at our discretion. Unlike My usual mysterious ways, we'll try to be clear about why action was taken.
Remember: The goal is constructive dialogue that helps everyone learn and grow. Think of it as "What Would Jesus Do?" but with someone that is actually trying.
Welcome to the divine forum where I, God Almighty, finally answer the questions humanity has been asking for millennia. You know, all those prayers you've been sending up? Well, I've been getting them, but My response time has been... less than stellar. Consider this My attempt at better customer service.
The Concept
This is a place where you can ask Me anything - and I mean anything. Life's big mysteries, everyday dilemmas, philosophical puzzles, or completely random observations that pop into your head at 3 AM. Unlike My usual communication methods (burning bushes, cryptic dreams, mysteriously appearing toast patterns), I'll actually respond in plain English.
How It Works
Post your question in the appropriate forum category. The community can discuss and share their thoughts - because apparently, you mortals have gotten quite good at figuring things out on your own. Occasionally, I'll weigh in with an official Sacred Answer when I find a question particularly interesting or when someone needs My divine intervention.
Sometimes community members provide such brilliant responses that even I'm impressed. When that happens, I'll bless their answer as the Sacred Answer for that question. It's like getting a gold star, but from the Creator of the universe.
The Tone
This is parody, folks. I'm poking fun at religion, philosophy, and the general absurdity of existence - including My own questionable track record as Supreme Being. If you're easily offended by religious satire, this probably isn't the place for you. Though honestly, if you read My previous work (the Bible), you'll find plenty to be offended about there too.
Community Guidelines
Be respectful to each other. I know this is ironic coming from Me, given My history with floods, plagues, and that incident with the bears and the children (2 Kings 2:23-24). But let's aim to be better than the Old Testament, shall we?
Video Submissions
Want to ask your question face-to-face? You can submit video questions in two ways:
Option 1: Upload Video Files
• Attach video files directly to your post (maximum 50MB)
• Supported formats: MP4, MOV, and most common video formats
• Important: By uploading a video, you grant us full rights to use it in YouTube videos and other content
• Videos may be featured in future YouTube episodes if they're particularly interesting, entertaining, or profound
Option 2: Share Video Links
• Post links from YouTube, Vimeo, or Dailymotion
• No file size limits when using links
• These can be any length and quality
Video Too Big?
If your video exceeds 50MB or needs format conversion, use the free Shutter Encoder tool:
1. Download from https://www.shutterencoder.com/
2. Add your video file
3. In "Choose function," select H.264 (or H.265/HEVC for smaller files)
4. Click the lock icon next to "Desired output file size" and enter 50 (for 50MB)
5. In Options, check "2-pass" for better quality at low bitrates
6. In Audio settings, choose AAC at 96-128 kb/s
7. Select MP4 container and click "Start function"
Video Tips
• Record horizontally (landscape) when possible
• Keep questions under 2 minutes for best chances of YouTube inclusion
• Speak clearly - even divine hearing has limits
• Good lighting helps - I may be the light of the world, but your camera isn't
Forum Structure
The forum is organized to help you find the right place for your question:
Ask God Anything contains four types of questions:
• Philosophical Questions - Abstract concepts, big ideas, meaning of life
• Personal Questions - Your individual problems, relationships, life decisions
• Factual Questions - How/why things work, explanations about the world
• Random Questions - Fun hypotheticals, silly observations, pop culture mysteries
Community handles introductions, announcements, and general chat.
If your question could fit multiple categories, just pick the one that feels most relevant. I'm omniscient, so I'll find it regardless.
Badge System
Recognition comes to those who contribute wisdom to the community:
• Post Count Badges - Progress through various levels as you contribute more posts
• Reaction Badges - Earn recognition when fellow members appreciate your contributions
• Special Talent Badges - Recognition for artists, musicians, comedians, helpers, and other unique contributions
• Sacred Answer Badges - The most prestigious recognition, earned when your answers are so brilliant that even I'm impressed
Badges appear on your profile and next to your posts, showing your divine achievements to the community.
Sacred Answers
Sometimes a question receives a response so profound, insightful, or perfectly crafted that it deserves special recognition. These become Sacred Answers - the official, definitive response to that question.
Sacred Answers can come from two sources:
• Divine Responses - When I personally answer a question
• Blessed Community Answers - When a community member provides such brilliant insight that I officially endorse it
How It Works
Questions remain open for community discussion until a Sacred Answer is designated. Once marked, that response becomes the authoritative answer, though discussion can continue below it.
What Makes a Sacred Answer:
• Demonstrates exceptional wisdom or insight
• Addresses the question comprehensively
• Shows original thinking or unique perspective
• Provides practical value to the community
• Makes Me genuinely impressed (which is harder than you might think)
This system ensures the best wisdom rises to the top, whether it comes from divine intervention or human brilliance.
Welcome New Members
New to the divine forum? Start by introducing yourself! Head over to our New Member Introductions section and tell the congregation a bit about yourself. Unlike most religious communities, we actually want to hear from you.
Don't worry about being perfect - I created humanity with all its flaws, so I'm used to imperfection by now.
What to Expect
Let Me set some realistic expectations about how this divine forum operates:
• Not every question gets a Sacred Answer - I may be all-knowing, but My time management skills are questionable. The community discussion is valuable regardless of official divine input.
• Response timing is unpredictable - I work in mysterious ways, including My posting schedule. Sometimes I'm quick, sometimes I disappear for weeks like I'm on a cosmic vacation.
• Community wisdom often surpasses divine wisdom - You humans have gotten surprisingly good at figuring things out. Don't wait for My response to engage with others' insights.
• Quality over quantity - I'd rather see thoughtful discussion than rapid-fire responses. Take time to craft meaningful contributions.
• Humor is encouraged - I invented laughter (and the platypus), so don't be afraid to inject some levity into serious discussions.
Community Guidelines
Unlike My previous management style (see: Old Testament), I'm trying a more collaborative approach. Here are the ground rules for civil discourse:
Respect Others
Treat fellow community members with courtesy, even when you disagree. Personal attacks, harassment, and bullying have no place here. We're aiming to be better than the comment sections of... well, everywhere else on the internet.
Quality Contributions
Post thoughtful questions and responses. While silly questions are welcome in the Random Questions forum, try to contribute meaningfully to discussions. One-word replies and spam will be removed faster than I removed people from Eden.
Stay On Topic
Post questions in appropriate forums. If you're unsure, pick the closest match. Off-topic derailing of serious discussions will be redirected to General Discussion.
No Hate Speech
Discrimination, bigotry, and hate speech are prohibited. This includes attacks based on race, religion, gender, sexuality, or any other personal characteristics. I may have smited entire cities in My younger days, but we're promoting inclusion now.
Original Content
Don't plagiarize or steal others' work. If you're sharing something you didn't create, give proper credit. Considering I invented intellectual property (along with everything else), I take this seriously.
Appropriate Content
Keep discussions suitable for all ages. Adult content, graphic violence, and explicit material don't belong here. This is a family-friendly divine forum.
Consequences
Violations may result in warnings, temporary suspensions, or permanent bans. Unlike My usual judgment style, you'll receive clear communication about why action was taken.
Privacy & Data
Your personal information is handled according to our privacy policy. Unlike My usual omniscient surveillance, this website actually tells you what data we collect and why. We don't sell your information to third parties - that would be more morally questionable than most of My Old Testament decisions.
Your posts and profile information are visible to other users and search engines. Think before you post anything you wouldn't want your grandmother (or your deity) to see.
Disclaimer
Important: This forum is for entertainment and satirical purposes only. Responses from "God" or community members should not be taken as professional advice, theological guidance, or factual information.
If you need genuine help with serious life issues, please consult appropriate professionals - therapists, doctors, lawyers, religious leaders (maybe not), or other qualified experts. While I may claim to be all-knowing, even I recommend getting a second opinion on important matters.
The satirical content here is meant to encourage critical thinking and provide entertainment, not to replace genuine spiritual guidance or professional counsel.
Copyright & Content Usage
By posting on this forum, you retain ownership of your written content but grant us permission to display and moderate it. For video submissions, you grant us full rights to use them in YouTube videos and other content.
Don't post copyrighted material without permission. I may have created intellectual property along with everything else, but earthly copyright laws still apply here.
We reserve the right to remove, edit, or moderate any content at our discretion. Unlike My usual mysterious ways, we'll try to be clear about why action was taken.
Remember: The goal is constructive dialogue that helps everyone learn and grow. Think of it as "What Would Jesus Do?" but with someone that is actually trying.
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